Bob Barker To Host Monday Night Raw: Predictions
If anyone reading this saw Happy Gilmore and enjoyed the Bob Barker appearance in the movie, then hold on to your hats because Bob Barker is hosting Monday Night Raw on Labor Day. Barker has been retired for almost two years from The Price Is Right. Drew Carey is doing well, but he is not Bob Barker and does things a bit differently. Here are my five predictions for Barker’s appearance.
1. Barker will order Hornswoggle the midget to play the “Mountain Climber Game”. He will have a random audience member guess the prices of pre-selected items and every dollar they are off will have Hornswoggle ascend up the ramp a step. If the contestant is off by too much, Hornswoggle will fall over the side of the entrance stage.
2. Barker will reveal at the end of the show that he is a secret advisor to Degeneration X as he crotch chops and tells the audience about his secret passion for Rage Against The Machine music.
3. Barker calls out Drew Carey, and much to the crowds delight, Carey shows up and accepts Barker’s challenge to a “Steel-Cage Showcase Showdown Submission Match”. Barker would be the good guy and brings long-time model and Barker Beauty Janice out while Carey, playing the heel, arrives with Mimi as he is booed heavily.
4. At about the midway point of the show, Barker brings out George “The Animal” Steele to remind the viewing audience to always have their pets spayed and neutered.
5. Conan O’Brien interferes in the “Showcase Showdown Steel Cage Match” between Barker and Carey to assist Carey. When no one is looking, Conan emerges through the floor of the ring and hits Barker with one of those thin foot long microphones. He then throws the microphone to the announce table where Andy Richter and LaBamba catch and hide the evidence. Conan than reaches into his trousers, and like Mick Foley had a sock, O’Brien has a Triumph The Insult Comic Dog hand puppet that he uses to help Carey choke Barker out with.
[…] So Bob Barker is going to host Monday Night Raw. Really, after watching Happy Gilmore this shouldn’t be a total surprise to anyone. For the record, if you’re over the age of 12 and watch Pro Wrestling, you’re a tard. No exceptions. <paneech> […]
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